Pat was silenced


Bulldogs World Forum Archives

These archives contain a copy of the contents of the old Bulldogs World Forum for reference purposes.Posting is disabled in the archives.
Click here to visit the active Bulldog Forum


Pat was silenced

and I'm concerned that she may not feel comfortable posting again. I think her motives were good. In fact, earlier she was complimented for the creativity of her questions, so that may have encouraged her to post them more often. Imagine the shock of being publicly criticized for doing the very same thing. I'm just trying to put myself in her position.

Perhaps instead if she had been emailed privately and asked to limit her curiosity questions to a couple times a week, would that have been better received? I'd like to think about how we can be more considerate of each other, realizing that we all make mistakes.

tmichaud's picture

Hey Cathie!

We're back in Boston full time now and I'm working regular hours Mon - Fri and Sanford is really happy to be home and out of NYC. I could tell immediately that he was so much happier when he realized I was packing him up every Friday and Sunday to take the 4 hr drive back and forth between Boston and NY.

I am seriously considering the puppy thing again... and am thinking the spring would be a good time to do it.

Cracked me up when you said Chopper feels the need to "rescue" the kids in the pool... Sanford does the SAME darn thing but the funny thing is he only does it to certain kids, not all of them. I don't know if it's because he likes them best or if he knows instinctually that those specific kids may actually need rescuing... LOL. Who knows, maybe he's the Dalai Lama of Bulldogs... ha ha!

Would love to see some new pic's of the Chop man and Stictch...



My opinion on new people and changes on the board

For what its worth....

I have been on this board for 7 1/2 years. Not as long as some, but definitely longer than most that post here nowadays. First off, let me say that I do NOT blame Diana for snapping at Pat. If it wasnt her it would have been someone else, and soon!

This board used to be a tight-knit group of a handful of people. It has grown to a massive amount of people over the years. New people come on here and some of them want to change things and do things differently- either right away or some hair-brained idea they get one day. Sometimes it is well-received and sometimes it doesnt sit well with people who liked - and loved it- just the way it was. The good morning posts, for example. It annoyed the hell out of a lot of people at first. Why do we need half a page of virtual coffee and hellos? But... more people liked it than disliked it, and now it's just part of the board. The pictures thing Julia mentioned is another example. Change. Some people leave when they dont like it anymore, but new people replace them and life goes on. Its called evolution. This board is no different than anything else in life.

However in this instance, its like the baby/bully talk. When it gets out of hand and damn near impossible to just "ignore" or "read past" because it is ALL YOU SEE when you open the board, it gets to be TOO much and someone will snap. Someone will scream and pull their hair out, we have a big "ordeal" on the board and it settles down. Thats what happens when you have so many people together in one place. People try to be polite til they just cant take it anymore.

When someone comes on the board and says they used to RUN their own board, and starts taking over by prodding and poking the board along by asking nonsense questions nonstop all day long- just see how many answers they can get -it gets on peoples' nerves. Like everything else though, some people like it and some people dont. I for one, dont. The board wasnt stagnant or slow-moving. It moved along all by itself. We dont need a new leader to run it their way. We do just fine. Its no different that moving into a new neighborhood and taking over organizing EVERY FREAKING THING and doing it HER WAY. It is bound to rub the new neighbors the wrong way and someone is bound to snap. It was Diana in this case, and I dont blame her. I was ready to pull my hair out too.

Now that said, I like Pat! She seems really nice and I hope she doesnt leave. She has bullies and that makes her belong here. We are usually a very welcoming bunch. We have allllll kinds of people here and we have spats sometimes. So what. Post your pictures, tell your stories. If you have questions- real ones- please ask. I do! Just dont try to run it. It is bound to piss some people off and when they finally blow up about it, its never in a polite way.

Someone snapped and screamed and pulled her hair out. It was heard, it is done. Let's move on. There are hundreds of people here. It happens. Let's move along now.



[linked image]
[linked image]

Funny you should say that...

I was going to comment that you are so diplomatic and politically correct! lol
Christie - you have a gift for saying what's on your mind without beating people over the head with it. Nothing for you to apologise for.
Keep doing what you do!
PS - I wouldn't mind too much if you wanted to monopolize... wink.gif

Olivia/Kano/Q-Ball
[linked image]

You should see her in action Gary....piss her off and she starts

dropping F-bombs!!! Yep our sweet Christie. I would have never believed it until I saw it.

Clovis Boo Flynn and Gary's picture

Christie, you ruthless wench, don't you belong to the both the C

lol, just kidding ya. You're one of the nicest people ever on this board.



BoosRV02

ALL PHOTOGRAPHS TAKEN BY ME ARE MY PROPERTY, ARE COPYRIGHTED UNDER FEDERAL LAW, AND CANNOT BE USED FOR ANY PURPOSE WITHOUT MY WRITTEN PERMISSION. ANY INCOME MADE OFF OF MY PHOTOS AT ANY TIME MUST BE IMMEDIATELY REMITTED TO ME.


ClovisForSignature

Boo13 New bulldog puppy - 5th photos 014

And click here for puppy photos of Boo & Clovis:

http://www.flickr.com/photos/glandry113

Tom is right, let it go Rae. Diana apologized.. let it go

no reason to keep badgering her.

Pat, I hope you come back. I enjoy...

your posts, and I love hearing about your dogs.

Michelle and Georgia's picture

That is a great format....

I belong to another dog board and it is run that way. Hot posts don't get pushed to the bottom or forgotten. You can "bump" up another "forgotten" post easily.

[linked image]

you keep digging

let it go

Dave and Zapper's picture

I post on there sometimes Gary :) (eom)



[linked image]

AmyandSophia's picture

Rae, now how did YOUR post just sound? You don't even know who y

and how she may feel about it. Lets not add insult to injury.

Amy and Sophia

Deborah and the NC gang's picture

omgosh Gary you are hilarious~~!!!! well kinda

a Disney World..."its a small world after all"...lol
mud wrestlin' well I won't even go there...LOL

hugs


http://www.flickr.com/photos/griffin6/
http://www.facebook.com/Deborah075?ref=name

[linked image]


EXACTLY!

The real problem here is the ancient technology this board uses. A simple upgrade would go a long way.

--
kirbysig2

Visit Kirby: flickr | youpet.com | YouTube

I mostly lurk, but I did read the posts and found it hurtful

I can see why Pat disappeared. I know if it was me, I would have. I agree with many posts in here that it is about how you say something. I found it an attack on Pat that was sarcastic and hurtful. There are better ways to go about saying things and I agree that sometimes it is best done in private than publicly criticzed. I work in rescue and deal with a lot of different personality and I wouldn't dare say something to a volunteer in front of everyone else. However, I don't mind taking them aside and expressing my concerns.

I rarely respond to any posts, but I do read a lot of them. Mostly because I'm crazy busy and I'm only in front of a computer at work. I love this board and I have always come here for advice, support or a laugh. However, it is very "clicky". Because I only luck now, unlike before, I usually only get responses from the people who knew be from before when I was a regular poster. People can pick and choose what they want to respond to, so if you don't like it, then don't respond. If you think something is getting out of hand, be nice and speak to the person privately, or contact one of the moderators.


Deanna, Daisy & Winston

www.albertaanimalrescuecrew.com
Daisy
Create cool Profile Comments


AmyandSophia's picture

Pam, I may not respond much to posts, but I ALWAYS read your res

I am sorry that I don't post more often in response to them, I just don't always have time. But I DO love reading your posts and they are always good ones....important ones. Please keep posting them.

Amy and Sophia

Clovis Boo Flynn and Gary's picture

There is an English Bulldog message board in that format

. . . it's at www.bulldogdomain.com. It's a very busy board too, just like this one. A lot of the same people post on both that one and this one.







BoosRV02

ALL PHOTOGRAPHS TAKEN BY ME ARE MY PROPERTY, ARE COPYRIGHTED UNDER FEDERAL LAW, AND CANNOT BE USED FOR ANY PURPOSE WITHOUT MY WRITTEN PERMISSION. ANY INCOME MADE OFF OF MY PHOTOS AT ANY TIME MUST BE IMMEDIATELY REMITTED TO ME.


ClovisForSignature

Boo13 New bulldog puppy - 5th photos 014

And click here for puppy photos of Boo & Clovis:

http://www.flickr.com/photos/glandry113

AmyandSophia's picture

Christie Girl, they don't come any sweeter and more kind than yo

You didn't say one word wrong at all. I believe Pat may have had her feelings hurt a bit, but not by you:-)

Amy and Sophia

Clovis Boo Flynn and Gary's picture

I sooo agree with your first sentence, i.e., coming here for fun

for a short while. In my profession, I deal with constant strife, so I prefer to not get involved when it pops up here, which fortunately is very infrequently. This is my alternative to Disney World, which obviously no one can go to every day unless they work there, in which case it may not be so fun to them. But this place is a place for fun and a place to unwind.

Now if only there was naked female mud wrestling so us guys could truly appreciate the beneath the surface inherent intellectual aspect involved.





BoosRV02

ALL PHOTOGRAPHS TAKEN BY ME ARE MY PROPERTY, ARE COPYRIGHTED UNDER FEDERAL LAW, AND CANNOT BE USED FOR ANY PURPOSE WITHOUT MY WRITTEN PERMISSION. ANY INCOME MADE OFF OF MY PHOTOS AT ANY TIME MUST BE IMMEDIATELY REMITTED TO ME.


ClovisForSignature

Boo13 New bulldog puppy - 5th photos 014

And click here for puppy photos of Boo & Clovis:

http://www.flickr.com/photos/glandry113

Jacinda and the bullies's picture

I don't think Pat was silenced

She can post anytime she wants. I admit that I rarely read her posts anymore and I do think they tend to monopolize the board but I would not want her to go away just maybe tone it down a bit. I don't think Diana said or did anything wrong. We all are entitled to our opinions after all.

I believe we are all adults here and can find a way to make BDW enjoyable for everyone.

Myspace Comments, Glitter Graphics at GlitterYourWay.com

CathyandAudrey's picture

Simple courtesy and human decency

is not all that difficult to accomplish. Rarely is saying nasty negative hurtful things to a person an acceptable way to handle your annoyance or anger. Singling out an individual, lashing out at them, and accusing them of having narcissistic motives behind their every post is far beyond a simple request to tone things down. Even though it was directed at one indiviual, the vehemence behind it did make others feel uncomfortable, unwelcome, and uncertain about how their own posts would be received. Especially ones, like myself, who are not oldtimers.

Cathy
when she first came home
Photobucket

Deborah and the NC gang's picture

I miss Pat...I usually don't say anything...I come here for fun

to forget the world around me for a short time...If I don't want to answer peoples posts or participate in them I don't answer...we do alot of theme days which has alot of pics etc of our babies...I enjoy the pics and the funny stories, life is very short which I have learned the hard way...some days just lurking is good enough for me... Hopefully Pat will return...maybe if there is a problem with someone then email the moderators privately to fix it...

hugs


http://www.flickr.com/photos/griffin6/
http://www.facebook.com/Deborah075?ref=name

[linked image]


Julia's picture

So then why don't we let the two people involved duke it out?

Instead of all adding to the drama? happy.gif

If one person attacked and one person defender herself, why not just leave it be?

[linked image]
Website ::: Blog ::: It's Not Over 'Til It's Grover
All photos and designs above copyright Salty Grapes Photography.

Well said..

...

Always in my heart...
Our Tillie

Clovis Boo Flynn and Gary's picture

I hope she comes back too, I enjoyed her questions, tho maybe li

them to two or three times a week. I love Bill's Friday night surveys but I'm glad they are once a week instead of twice a day. The once a week sort of builds up your anticipation and gives you something to look forward to. If Bill was doing his surveys twice a day, I think many people would get annoyed. So if Pat limits the frequency of her questions, that should help a lot.



BoosRV02

ALL PHOTOGRAPHS TAKEN BY ME ARE MY PROPERTY, ARE COPYRIGHTED UNDER FEDERAL LAW, AND CANNOT BE USED FOR ANY PURPOSE WITHOUT MY WRITTEN PERMISSION. ANY INCOME MADE OFF OF MY PHOTOS AT ANY TIME MUST BE IMMEDIATELY REMITTED TO ME.


ClovisForSignature

Boo13 New bulldog puppy - 5th photos 014

And click here for puppy photos of Boo & Clovis:

http://www.flickr.com/photos/glandry113

who wouldn't strike back after being insulted?

we forget why we are "supposed" to be here. We love the breed, we love our dogs, we want to share information and help eachother. Whether you are new or are a board veteran it does not matter and Pat had a right to respond to the insult IMO

www.midatlanticbulldogrescue.com

B_Tracey's picture

Losing the history would be dreadful...

how else would you have spent those 20 minutes yesterday finding that titer post happy.gif. I often search back through the history for medical issues in particular.

I am not criticizing the board whatsoever, if it was horrible, I wouldn't be here LOL happy.gif.

Just saying that other formats allow for easier ignoring happy.gif.

B_Tracey's picture

Let's not forget...

I just wanted to say (without being branded with the scarlet letter) that I appreciated Diana's sentiment yesterday in regards to Pat (although yes it could have been said nicer). Although I'd hate to see Pat "bullied" off the board I didn't realize that I wasn't the only one turning into a bit of a lurker because the posts were just getting to be too much.

I hope people don't forget that Pat in turn attacked Diana too, and it seems Diana is being made the "bad guy" even though others echoed her sentiment.

I hope Pat comes back to the board and I hope that we aren't making Diana the new victim today.

Rhonda_Winnie and Shooter's picture

I wasn't posting much cause I knew it'd get lost.

I ended up posting less and lurking more. I WAS thinking that it was sort of turning into Pat's personal board.

winnie close up

IMHO no one should feel they are "walking on eggshells"

and posting one's own email address offers the opportunity to reply directly (its only one click away)if anyone feels they have something private to say. We all have bad days too...I've jumped on people occasionally when I thought they weren't using their brains and I welcome anyone to settle me down when needed. Y'all ready for a "group hug"? happy.gif

Rhonda_Winnie and Shooter's picture

I thought you were being honest.

I've felt the same way so was posting less and less. I was bothered that when I did post I couldn't get a response 'cause it was already old.

winnie close up

Pat has been a huge help to me!

I appreciate her posts. She was always the first one to answer my cries (sometimes literally) for help with our Spanky. I owe her a huge thanks! Ela1ne, if you speak with her, please extend my thanks.

If there were an easy way to bring a topic that got buried to th

I don't think we would be having this conversation. Since its about important topics being buried. Is there a way to that? I know I've seen it on other forums in the past. Just a thought

[linked image]

Rhonda_Winnie and Shooter's picture

I thought you were very kind.

There has to be a balance on the board. People need to feel free to post but not to monopolize the board.

winnie close up

Rhonda_Winnie and Shooter's picture

I Like that Idea!



winnie close up

wow, you sound sincere :( n/m

Re: it isn't for Pat, she still feels hurt about this

Nah, I'm good. I've said it on a public forum and if that's not good enough for her...I don't know what else to say.

Diana, Mattingly and Jeter

I don't have a problem with anyone saying how they feel

but it just came off as lashing out, that was my only issue. I don't think emailing would've been any different, posting your issues is productive to me, just not terse pent up anger. You also realize, there might be a regional sensitivity thing going on here too, I'm from the east coast, my Dad lives in NYC, I assume you are from NY with those Yankee dogs, haha. Well when I lived in LA, people thought I was a jerk at times because my responses to things were far more direct than they were used to, I think that could definitely play a part.

My Tiger


Photobucket

put me on your email list!!!! lol!!

I still haven't figured out how to use face book even though I've had an account for a long time. Tech. challenged............. happy.gif

[linked image]

onslowsmom's picture

Good point

n/m

'Twas not my lips you kissed
But my soul ~ Judy Garland
[IMG][linked image][/IMG]

[IMG][linked image][/IMG]

yes

I'm sure she is hurt. I know it doesn't just go way as quickly as it happens. My apologies for my thoughtless comment.

[linked image]

I'll ask her to read today's posts...

and the decision to re-activate/rejoin is HERS. happy.gif

onslowsmom's picture

Umm you better not

LOL

'Twas not my lips you kissed
But my soul ~ Judy Garland
[IMG][linked image][/IMG]

[IMG][linked image][/IMG]

onslowsmom's picture

Well it's mostly in FB emails

but I'd love to have you join us on FB sometimes we joke on public threads. Anyone who wants to can look me up by email onslowsmom78@yahoo.com.

'Twas not my lips you kissed
But my soul ~ Judy Garland
[IMG][linked image][/IMG]

[IMG][linked image][/IMG]

it isn't for Pat, she still feels hurt about this

so whoever wants to apologize feel free to send her an email

www.midatlanticbulldogrescue.com

Dave and Zapper's picture

Yes



[linked image]

Kel1h2k's picture

Re: Bully talk

UM, I wanna subscribe too... I used to read those posts sitting at the bar at home and the kids would come read over my shoulder... they got a big bang out if it too... I am not clever enough to let Chloe use the computer LOL

~Kellie and Chloe~
[linked image]

I agree,

nm

[linked image]

Dave and Zapper's picture

Can I post the Santa picture ?? LMAO !!! (eom)



[linked image]

Julia's picture

For free? =)

happy.gif

[linked image]
Website ::: Blog ::: It's Not Over 'Til It's Grover
All photos and designs above copyright Salty Grapes Photography.

me.too

Please e-mail me on how to be your friend. Loved when Russell the muacle got in there too. He has not been on in a long time

Page 1 of 3
More articles we recommend: