ron and i "had" farcus a year after moving in together. (it took me that whole year to wear him down by planting pictures of bully puppies around the house!)

stacibix,ron,farcus&eliza

I was a 'conscience objector' to having children.
As a pre-teen and teen babysitting for other's kids I never enjoyed it, actually it made me nervous/anxious. As a young adult I worked long hours, weekends and/or several jobs to make ends meet and felt there wouldn't be adequate time to devote to a child. Having my mother babysit was never an option as I didn't want to subject a child to the restrictive, regimented and hyper-disciplined style of parenting I was raised with, not to mention the quirky religious ideas....
Actually my mother often asked when I was going to get married and have grandchildren 'for her'. I always gave her a non-committal answer, but the real truth was 'about 9 months after hell freezes over!'

Sounds like you made some wise choices--even though things didn't go as planned. As parents we are "rich" in some pretty incredible ways, even though we may have to make some financial sacrifices

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=3884&id=100000547635433&saved#/photo.php?pid=59075&id=100000547635433

We did not have children by choice. We have had a special bulldog for the past twenty years. I have taught school for almost thirty years; I enjoy the students at school but I also like leaving them there. We enjoy family and friend's children. I find it interesting how many bullie parents do not have children.

"we have been together for 13 years... lagging on the wedding thing"

Sean and I are also like you guys, I am about your age, and we have been together 20 years (except 9 months where we were broke up). Used to want to get married, but we have seen so many of our friends married and divorce and now on their second marriages. If it's not broke...don't fix it I suppose

And also as far as the kids...I have never had that "maternal" feeling when I have held someones kid.....but give me a bulldog puppy....

and I don't regret it at all! Everyone always asks my Mom why Lottie and Jeff didn't have kids and my mom's response is always the same "because they were the smart ones!". LOL

i am 33 now and my almost husband is 36, we have been together for 13 years... lagging on the wedding thing... he comes from a family that traditionally MUST have children and especially a boy... whereas I grew up with 4 sisters and couldn't wait to get out of there and never had the urge to bring more people into this world! maybe this is why we are hesitant to get married...?

now after having multiple animals together, he is starting to see the light and not want kids anymore, especially since we are in the age range where all of our friends and family are on their first and second kids... we see the screaming, trauma, and work involved... its just too much responsibility to have! i think i would be one of those moms who forgets where she left her kid or my worst fear is that my kid would grow up and be a serial killer or something! we also enjoy our freedom way too much.

we talked and decided that if we want kids, we would try to adopt instead, maybe someone past the diaper age?

i think it would be nice if we could just adopt an 18 year old and just try to help him/her through life... wouldn't it kinda be like adopting a senior bully!??

senior dogs are the best!

either way, we plan on having alot more dogs first.

I like kids but I LOVE babies but because there isn't anything on the market yet that I've come across that you can feed them to keep them under 10 months of age I chose the NEXT best thing which is a BULLDOG!!!!

Sanford is more than enough for me. I tell people all the time having Sanford is like having a permanent infant and I am thankful and BLESSED everyday of our lives together. I wouldn't choose to have or live my life any other way.

At this point in my life I am much too set in my ways and comfortable with my life being what it is so if the right guy does come along he better be happy to have Bulldog babies otherwise he isn't going to have me. LOL.

We talked about skin kids a few times, but neither one of us were terribly interested. We've been married 20 years & I'm now 44 & never felt the ticking clock, so it's all worked out for us. Roxy is definitely our kid. I never had a dog growing up & I've enjoyed evey minute of having a bully!!

If I brought one into the world under these circumstances. I don't doubt my ability to parent a child I just question the fairness.

There are definitely some people who should have never had children.

I was just too stupid to prevent it, but I did choose not to kill my unborn child and I chose to keep him and raise him instead of giving him up for adoption. There is nothing in the world that can truly prepare you for the overwhelming love you feel for your child. My husband and I were 16 when we had our son, and although I wish we had him later, there is not a moment in the 24 years since that I have ever regretted having him.We love him fiercely and always have. We both knew that we wanted more children, and the 2 girls were each very planned for and very wanted. We are a team though and I can not imagine having a chld without a life partner like that. We didn't want the daycare setting either so we have been a one income family for 19 years. There were times when my husband had 3 jobs and there were times when we were hungry at night, but our little family is so worth every moment. The joy a child brings is indescribable! I have no regrets and look forward to getting old surrounded by my amazing children and grandchildren.

Cathy
when she first came home

Never really had the patience for kids but I've always had animals. I guess I just like the fact that I can put down a bowl of food on the floor and let Hurley eat and she will appreciate like she just ate a 7 course meal and a 5 Star restaurant. I don't think a kid would appreciate it that much. LOL

sounds like me, I have no desire to have children whatsoever. Of course when I was younger I did want a few but things had to be in order. I'm pretty independent so career and being financially capable of being able to take care of myself and kids would have been priority. Now that I'm older and have nieces and nephews (and now a great-niece and nephew) I have no desire to have children and I always said if I ever did have kids I'd adopt and have a little multi-cultural family. Still working on the financial part of that! LOL As if!!!

Shelley - Sophie N Angels Mocha & Stella

thinking...they just think it's EXPECTED and don't truly consider what it means. My coworker, after the birth of his child, was really shocked at the sleep deprivation and ANNOYED...I just kept thinking, what did you THINK it would be like?

for me too...personally, I would not be comfortable with daycare or a nanny and could not afford to live on one income (not many can now)...I don't judge anyone who does the dayccare thing, it's just a personal choice I wouldn't want to make...of course if I had felt that maternal longing I would have had to work something out I guess!

I did have a year or so around the age of 37 that I actually was buying books on single motherhood. But thankfully it was only a fleeting moment of clock ticking depression, LOL!

My husband and I met when we were 40 and married at 46(first marriage for both of us). My career and the horses kept me very busy and it took along time to find the right guy I guess. Although sometimes I wonder why I ever wanted to get married. Men can be such pains.

Children just weren't in Gods plans for us at 40

I was blessed with a step-daughter who is a lovely woman now. She was 15 when we married. Neither my husband or I wanted more. We have such a tough time being on constant duty with one adorable old bulldog, I don't think we could have ever survived a baby!

My mom was a super young mom (14yrs when she had me) and I help out allot with my 3 younger brothers. I had my nephew allot when he was growing up (loved it, he is great!). I thought it was really important to be a independent woman and be able to take care of myslef since my mom never did that. I met & married my husband in my early 30's and we just have never taken the plunge. Now that I am in my early 40's, I don't want to start now. Taking care of a house full of Bulldogs is work enough Don't get me wrong...I love taking care of them, I already wipe butts, noses, prepare meals, etc... babies aren't in the cards for me.




http://norcalbulldogrescue.org

I never had any desire to have children unless they have four feet and a wiggly tail.

I felt the same way about children until I met my husband. Now we have a 6 month old ilttle girl. I will say that Boris is WAY more needy and more work than our two legged daughter. So YES, I am now wiping two butts a day..

Boris

been on both sides of the fence..
I had 3 boys in a row..
now 5 dogs in 3 years..

they each require love
they make me cry
they make me laugh
they make me enjoy life
they keep me busy
they need to be fed
the list goes on and on..very similar..and about the same amount of work...maybe not the same amount of money to raise but the time and effort is about the same for both..


biggest difference is no diapers..lol
I am glad that I had 3 kids
look forward to grandkids someday
and glad that MY DOGS will never really ever grow up, they will always need me to till the very end..

I'm not a kid person. Which always manages to shock everyone because I'm such a goofball. I just don't have that "feeling" you're supposed to have to WANT kids.

Interestingly, I was married to someone with the exact same feelings for about 6 years. Now that we're no longer married, I often wonder if it was because I knew he would be a rotten father... LOL... and that our relationship would have been horrible post-children. Even though I'm not big on babies and toddlers and kids, every now and then nowadays, I find myself wondering... what if I meet the "right" person who would be a wonderful father? Would that suddenly change my entire opinion? I've definitely softened over the years being around my friends' kids.

Still no clock ticking though. I try to listen for it... nothin'. I figure I have a couple years... just a couple though!

Grover was my child... we fawned over him as if he was truly our child. We got him shortly after we moved in together, and we got married a year or so later, so it was all very much young, exciting love. He grew up in our first apartment, and the 3 of us had all of our "firsts" together, like our first house and all that. Thankfully for me, custody wasn't even an issue during the divorce. (Says a lot about the jackass I thought I loved.)

Never say never, but Gretl is definitely PLENTY for me. I much prefer a life of picking up poop, cleaning bums with WetOnes, diaper cream all over the house, pacifier toys and toddler clothes. WAIT JUST A SECOND...



Website ::: Blog ::: It's Not Over 'Til It's Grover
All photos and designs above copyright Salty Grapes Photography.

um, or EIGHT :0) and you could be on the news...

No, really, I like this thread... having kids (or not having) should be thought provoking. I am looking forward to the day my 2 leggers are grown :0) (does that EVER happen?)

~Kellie and Chloe~

Tamsen, LOL, I like your reasoning... that's why i had kids, so I'd have somebody to dress up (LOL, just kidding!) but I thought it was cute. (actually I have boys and they DON'T WANT to be dressed up, so I had to get a bully :0)


~Kellie and Chloe~

I always thought I would have a couple of kids but for some reason the time to do so has never felt right. Part of it is because I have helped raise my brother's three children. He is a single father and I help out when I can.

I have thought a lot about having a child since my Mother died this year. I have gone over and over the pros and cons and I just don't know what the answer is. But, it's not something I have to decide on today. I still have a couple of years to think about it. I would kind of like to have ONE child but with my luck I would end up with six.

I like kids, but I like my freedom better. Had I married Mr. Right, well then maybe. I didnt so I am glad I did not have kids. I like my pets and my pets like me and that is that. We can go anywhere and they are happy no matter what and I am happy that they are with me. I don't have to worry about smartass teenagers, unwanted pregnancies, college arguments, etc. but then a side of me says no children to dress ups for halloween, or easter, or christmas, and so I got a bulldog. tee heee. J & T

When I was younger, I didn't want ANY. But after my mom passed, I thought maybe one, but I had to have things in "order", a career (my mom and dad were divorced, and she was a factory worker, that never finished high school, but later went and obtained her GED, she was 46 when she passed), and a home (not renting, but a home I had bought)....you get the picture of the "order" etc.

I am glad I haven't (especially after having lunch with a friend who brought her two along) I like being able to pick up and go. If I want to go to a dog show, I do, if I want to sleep in, I do. But then again, I have these "fur" kids, and it is as bad as having real ones. My life revolves around them. Very similar...but I don't have to worry about my kids going to school, getting into drugs, etc, and the heartache or disappointment when they choose horrible horrible decisions.

Don't get me wrong, I like kids, but well mannered.

thanks for sharing that, I often wondered the "why or why not" I always knew I was meant to be a mom,